Friendship is the most healthy human relationship that is not bound by blood relationships. Here two people choose to spend time together and stand for each other merely because they want to.
There is no apparent motive for such a bond. People do not have any condition or clause for this bond to exist. In a traditional Indian set up, this type of relationship was encouraged among members of the same gender. Over time, society became more, and friendships between boys and girls started to evolve.
However, although a boy and a girl can be friendly cannot be closer than a specific limit. This idea stems from the functional logic that there is an absolute physical limit to which two people of the opposite gender es can come close.
When people do not maintain that personal threshold, it is natural for some hormonal changes to take place. That will lead to attraction, and the two people will no longer remain just best friends.
Moreover, there are certain things in which a person will feel the need to share with his or her best friend. One can not carry out all of that with someone from the opposite gender.
Top 07 Factors that Make to be Best of Friends:
In this article, we shall talk about the factors that make it all the way more infeasible for a guy and a girl to be the best of friends.
01. You will not be Able to Share Everything With Them:
There are specific concerns of a girl (like her problems with periods) that she will not be able to share with boys. Similarly, a guy will also not be able to share all of his concerns with a girl.
In the presence of a member of their gender, both will be able to open up properly. As a result, there will be a strengthening of the bond, and the two friends will become best friends.
02. Traditional Gender Roles Affecting Close Friendships:
When a boy and a girl become friends, they expect certain specific predefined functions out of each other. As a girl, one is expected to take care of the more delicate details and handle the moving part of the friendship.
They are also likely to help set the guy up with the girl of his choice.
The guy, on the other hand, is expected to take up a protective role and take good care of his female friend all the time. Failing to stand up to these expectations has a very negative impact when the two people become best friends.
03. People will assume that You are Dating:
In an ideal situation, it should not matter to you about what people think of you. However, when you are actively discouraged from pursuing your friendship with somebody, it is bound to take its toll.
Moreover, this affects you when you want to date somebody. As people have the general misconception that you are already in a relationship, people will not consider dating you even if you are interested in them.
04. It Hampers Your Relationship with Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend:
Even if you do manage to get into a relationship, your problems do not end there if you have a best friend of the opposite gender. As much pure your relationship with your different gender best friend maybe, your partner will not view it in the same light. Most partners will start doubting such a thing.
Any girlfriend will be uncomfortable with her boyfriend being close to any girl other than herself. A boy will also have similar insecurities regarding his girlfriend.
This insecurity will lead to unnecessary misunderstandings and hamper the relationship of both the best friends (with their respective partners). To avoid such a thing, one should always try making best friends from the same gender.
People get too comfortable in such friendships.
When someone becomes best friends with a person of the opposite gender, they end up sharing their deepest secrets with them.
At the same time, they end up becoming extremely open to each other and speak in all honesty. Physical proximity comes up, and frequent hugs often accompany it.
All this leads to a situation wherein the two people concerned start seeing each other as more than mere friends. This type of feeling does not just complicate relationships, but it also hampers the friendship in general.
05. Jealousy Seeps in:
As much as one would deny, the fact is a girl does get jealous when her male best friend gets into a relationship and starts spending more time with someone else. It is because she finds it difficult to adjust to the fact that she is no longer the only girl in his life.
In the case of a guy who is single and whose female best friend has recently taken to dating, the situation is similar. This type of jealousy leads to fights and results in the friendship turning sour.
06. They consider Each Other as Valid Options for Dating:
Although this might be the last resort, the fact is if one is extremely close with a member of the opposite gender, at some point or the other, they will be tempted to consider the other person as a viable option for dating.
Finding your best friend as a viable dating option is usually the last resort and happens when you do not see much hope elsewhere. This type of situation occurs after one friend has a breakup while the other is single.
07. Parental Expectations Make Things Difficult:
When a guy and a girl come together as best friends, the parents and other family members have something to say about it. Either they are encouraged by the fact and expect the friendship to turn into a relationship, or they want the two friends to keep away from each other.
The latter scenario is more common in the Indian context and arises when parents do not approve of the opposite gender friendship of their children.
In both cases, as mentioned earlier, the reaction from parents hampers the real bond that the two people share. This disapproval or overindulgence from parents leads to several unnecessary differences and fights.
RELATED QUESTIONS
What is the Best Thing About Having a Best Friend From Your Gender?
Different than the fact that you can share anything and everything with them, the best thing about having a friend from your gender is that they will not grow bored of your tantrums.
As a girl, you will find your girl best friend happily accompanying you to your shopping sprees thoroughly enjoying herself all the boy.
Similarly, for boys, the best friend will enjoy your company over a beer and a cricket or football match. As people of the same gender, you will have similar interests, and that will help in strengthening the friendship.
Is it Possible for Siblings to Be the Best of Friends?
Often, we see that in the case of siblings with a minimum age difference, a strong friendship is developed. The foundation of this type of attachment is in the fact that there are many sweet childhood memories to cement things whenever any differences arise.
Moreover, being related by blood, siblings know that they will stand by each other irrespective of what comes their way. However, this type of close-knitted friendship may be difficult to establish in the case of siblings with a lot of age difference among them.
What Makes Best Friends Different From Regular Friends?
One expects any person to make many friends in the course of his or her life and end up maintaining a cordial relationship with most of them throughout the same.
However, there will only be a handful of people in front of whom they will be able to open up and show their true selves without having to worry about being judged.
These people are the ones who are best friends. In case a person needs any form of help or support, best friends are the ones they will rush to.
Can a Couple be Best Friends?
As a couple, there will always be some type of romantic involvement. It will be difficult for anyone to accommodate passionate participation in any friendship.
There is no doubt about the fact that over time a couple will come to be really attached and understand each other very well. However, it will be challenging for the two of them to become best friends.
In the best interests of everyone, both the boy and the girl concerned should have separate best friends.
Can One have Only a Single Best Friend?
A best friend is that chosen friend who is expected to stand by a person through thick and thin. Usually, very few people from your friend circle have it in them to become your best friend.
But, in case you are lucky enough to find more than one such friend, it is not mandatory to restrict yourself to choosing only one amongst them. In many cases, we see that more than one friend is becoming the best friend(s).